Help.

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One of my oldest friends is dying of ovarian cancer. It's hard to say or to type or to think but it's real and it's happening and it's on my mind every day. She is 28 years old.

Nicole and I first met in Cedar Lane, a high school for teens who have suffered trauma and abuse as children. We shared the same art class, although never even spoke until I was looking for someone to go see Joni Mitchell with at Merriweather Post Pavillion. She had the car and I had the tickets. Joni wasn't at her best. She was visibly tired singing classic jazz standards and playing with a 20 piece string section. Nicole and I were bummed as as we left, so we rolled the windows down and blasted "Carey." Everyone in the parking lot started cheering and dancing. For a moment, we felt like celebrities.

I moved in with Nicole and her family during my senior year of high school. My mother had recently relapsed on heroin and left behind a husband, three very young children, and me. Nicole's mother and brothers welcomed me into their home without a second thought. They bought me clothes, fed me and became my family.

Nicole and I didn't talk as regularly when I moved to New York although she came to visit twice. Two years went by and we hardly spoke at all. I knew that she had graduated from VCU and was living in a farm house with her girlfriend..canning tomatoes and knitting and genuinely loving life.

When she called me (three times in one day) almost two years ago, I was sure it was good news. I assumed she was calling to tell me that she was getting married or going to graduate school. I returned her call a day later.

"I've just had a hysterectomy," she said. "it's not good."

I immediately took the bus down to Virginia and stayed in bed with her for 4 days. We ate chocolate and watched reality television. Sometimes we cried.

Nicole's condition is terminal. The tumors are inoperable. The chemo slows, but cannot stop it. The side effects of the chemotherapy are pure hell.
Imagine having the worst hang over of your life, every fucking day and then multiply that by 100.

Nicole does not have insurance.

She does not come from money, nor does she have any to speak of.
She is no longer able to afford the pills that help to quiet the nausea.

The Doctors would like to install a drain in her stomach that would keep her from having to throw up. Nicole would prefer the pills.

This October I'll be getting married. If Nicole is able to, she will stand beside me and be my Maid of Honor.

Please help me stand beside her.
Please help my family.

All my love and thanks,

Erin Regan

Help Nicole Now!