Craig's list hook up?
Sun, 05/08/2011 - 12:20am
Somebody told me today that hooking up through Craig's List is like a common thing. Is that true? Is there something really depressing about that or is it okay to reduce intercourse to a transaction similar to buying a used pair of speakers?
Tue, 05/10/2011 - 4:01pm
#2
i am for it!
make it a morality issue if you want, but some folks just want to have a good old fashioned, no strings attached, romp in the hay.
when you think about it, we're all a "used pair of sneakers".
Tue, 05/10/2011 - 6:11pm
#3
Very romantic.
Very romantic.
Tue, 05/10/2011 - 6:59pm
#4
yeah, yeah, yeah
not everyone can be so lucky as to have someone so wonderful, fun and cool as nan, matthew.
Tue, 05/10/2011 - 7:47pm
#5
That's nice of you to say.
That's nice of you to say. And I don't mean to judge. Good relationships are work any way you slice it. I suppose I was getting at a bigger issue of access. Perhaps it's not so good for "everything" to be so convenient?
Tue, 05/10/2011 - 9:40pm
#6
Craig List Killer
EEK!
Tue, 05/10/2011 - 10:43pm
#7
Seriously.
Seriously.
Sun, 05/15/2011 - 11:11am
#8
bars
Spend time & money in an unhealthy (to yr liver & ears) environment, hook up.
Not so laudable either, yeah?
I mean, it may not be transactional, but it's not exactly inspiring.
Sun, 05/15/2011 - 11:40am
#9
Agreed. That's why I always
Agreed. That's why I always found my best hook ups at Churches and AA meetings. (just kidding)
I guess my point is not so much the medium but the sentiment that sex is just reduced to a "hook up" or a simple transaction and that somehow this can be a safe and easy place for that. There's already a name for that. It's called prostitution. Which is fine if that's how you wanna go and the porn just ain't cutting it but I don't think it's a very healthy way to go. But I'm essentially a monogamist so there you go. I think sex is a lot like food. The more fast food you eat the harder it is to get into a good healthy meal.
At least in a bar there is some degree of social activity. And no one is making you drink. I'm not opposed to online dating but I think it's important to at least have to goal of getting to know a person. Sorry if that sounds old fashioned.
Sun, 05/15/2011 - 12:25pm
#10
pro what?
calling "hooking up" with someone prostitution is a very Fox news way to put it. its uninformed, and misleading. no money exchanges place and i'm actually pretty surprised you would say something like that.
i have never partaken in the craigslist hook up, but as i am a free thinking individual who does not judge others for their decisions in how they go about things, i find there to be nothing wrong with "hooking up" however you do it. if its two, or three or four, consenting adults, who cares how they meet, or what they do with their own "personal" time. get it, personal, just like an add in a newspapers periodicals.
perhaps its just a generation thing. people from your generation didn't do things like that, and those darn kids these days ;)
Sun, 05/15/2011 - 5:28pm
#11
You misunderstood me. I just
You misunderstood me. I just said I don't think it's healthy. Of course people have the right to do whatever they want. That doesn't mean it's good for them. I would not be defending the personals as a path to happiness. And let's face it if it's in a public newspaper or website then it's not really so "personal." And that's part of the problem in my opinion. Sex is intimate personal thing and as soon as you start turning it into a simple transaction then I think you're really messing with you ability to form deeper meaningful sexual relationships. Just my opinion. No I don't think you should wait until you're married or even until the second date but if your goal is nothing but getting off then I don't think that's ultimately healthy for either party.
If your intent is just to have sex with someone then I don't see it any different from prostitution really. It's a simple transaction. In fact I think it might even be worse because chances are you are deceiving them into thinking that it's more. I think prostitution should be legal by the way.
I call Party Foul on the FOX and "generational" remark. Makes me feel bad. Speaker, please read my stuff more closely before you comment.
Sun, 05/15/2011 - 6:07pm
#12
hmmm...
understanding is important. its important for me to understand you and vice versa. the generation remark, was meant to poke fun. you and i are not so far apart in age my friend. thus the wink ;).
what i did not misunderstand is you calling hooking up prostitution. you can't call something prostitution that is not matt. prostitution is the sale of sex for money. hooking up on craigslist or anywhere else is the act of two consenting adults getting together (no money involved), and its not necessarily sex either. you are making a derogatory statement that is false. hooking up does not equate to prostitution, at all.
hooking up means many things to many people. yes it can mean sex. but it can also mean heavy petting, making out, oral sex, or shoving a cigar in a willing partners hooha. it can also mean meeting up, connecting cables, or plugging into something.
it was not my intention to hurt your feelings tho, and for that i am sorry. i believe you and i are on different sides of an opinion and i understand what you are saying, but i whole heartily disagree with you because of the way you perceive the term "hooking up".
my point of view is this... as a single guy in brooklyn, i happen to like meaningless sex with multiple partners. i like hooking up. its exciting and fun =)
Mon, 05/16/2011 - 12:06am
#13
Sorry I was talking about
Sorry, I was talking about sex... That's how it was told to me. To me hooking up always just meant having sex or sexual relations. As opposed to just hugging. Or watching a movie? Sorry for the misunderstanding? That's what I meant. Anyway it's about intimacy in the end. I didn't mean to judge your lifestyle.
I'm sorry, I guess I was just being a little dramatic in my statement. I should have said something like: I feel like cruising craigslist ads to find someone to have sex with comes across as very similar to just picking out a prostitute in the back of the Village Voice. It's not prostitution as defined by our laws though I think in situations like these a different type of currency is exchanged. I think it contributes to reducing sex to a simple "transaction" type experience, similar to the way prostitution does, with no goal of fostering a deeper loving relationship. For people sex means something. "It is the glue of love," as a friend of mine puts it. We try to act like it can be a simple recreational activity like soccer or masterbation but I just don't think that's true. Unless this meaning or value is defined clearly I think you always run the risk of one of the parties getting confused and/or hurt.
Mon, 05/16/2011 - 1:46pm
#14
This scene totally needs a
This scene totally needs a debate club.
Mon, 05/16/2011 - 6:48pm
#15
shoving a cigar in a willing partners hooha?????
Matt, after you figure out your camera, please, NO pics of that!
Thanks!
And Brian.... tsk tsk tsk, you're a naughty boy, huh, aren't you! Uhh,, yes you are! ;)
Tue, 05/17/2011 - 4:33am
#16
if by naughty you mean, like
if by naughty you mean, like President Clinton, then... yeah, why not! i'm like a lot of people, including those in higher postions making decisions on our health and well being as American Citizens.
Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:17am
#17
I was trying to imitate Peter
I was trying to imitate Peter Griffin (Family Guy). It didn't translate well to here.
Wed, 05/18/2011 - 8:30pm
#18
doh!
i don't watch family guy. though it seems like 99% of the people i know do. =)
Thu, 05/19/2011 - 8:39am
#19
its ok
my kids used to make me watch it. They also made me watch Ren & Stimpy, The Simpson's, Sesame Street, Elephant Show, Daily Show, etc. I drew the line at Adult Swim.
Fri, 05/20/2011 - 12:23am
#20
wait...
bin laden died?
Fri, 05/20/2011 - 2:00am
#21
ha
I wonder if Matt really thought he would get people to say
"Oh yeah, I use Craigslist all the time to hook up for sex"
People don't normally admit to that.
But hey. It sure is tantalizing. free, no strings attached sex?
I mostly stick to listening to Savage Love to get my kicks.
Fri, 05/20/2011 - 9:28am
#22
I don't really know what the
I don't really know what the crazy are kids are into these days. For all I knew it was an "everybody does it" kind of thing at this point. I just thought it might spring up some interesting convo as it did. I'm curious to see what people think about sex and its significance.
Tue, 05/24/2011 - 10:46am
#23
Back to my point...
Does free and easy acces to no strings attached sex make the world a happier/better place?
And I suppose the follow up to that would be: Is there really such a thing as "no strings attached" sex?
Tue, 05/24/2011 - 11:13am
#24
yes and yes
orgasms make people happy.
"no strings attached" means you are having protected sex, not tying someone up, and don't have to call them out of obligation.
IMO
Wed, 05/25/2011 - 10:00am
#25
What's wrong with tying
What's wrong with tying someone up? It can be very exciting sometimes ; )
Tue, 05/24/2011 - 11:46am
#26
sex/food
sometimes things of lower value can serve the purpose of making us appreciate things of higher value. so even if one kind of sex produces less happiness it could still help people realize what does make them most happy. happiness is a process in a lot of ways and its hard to skip steps. i cant say that one type of sex has an objectively higher value. that said, imagine two strangers sitting at a table eating next to each other. they dont need to say a word or even really acknowledge each other to enjoy/benefit from what they are eating- even more so if its a healthy delicious meal. however, going to the market with someone you love, cooking a meal, and then sitting down and enjoying it together is wonderful and doesnt seem to happen as often...jen fool
Tue, 05/24/2011 - 9:44pm
#27
That's totally beautiful.
That's totally beautiful.
Wed, 06/08/2011 - 11:03am
#28
Belatedly read and agreed.
Belatedly read and agreed.
Speaker?